\u201cI am Peter,\u201d he said \u2013 and anyone who listened closely could sense that he was giving a name here as if it were a rare good. \u201cAnd I am happy every day \u2013 not because everything is perfect, but because I align my everyday life with a sense of meaning.\u201d<\/p>\n
He paused, and you could hear how the silence examined him.<\/p>\n
\u201cNot with mood,\u201d he said. \u201cNot with motivation. But with a sense of meaning that carries \u2013 even on days when I don\u2019t feel like it.\u201d<\/p>\n
Hans thought: Desire is Walpurgis Night. Meaning is everyday life. And both are fighting.<\/p>\n
\u201cMy meaning,\u201d said Dr. AuDHS, \u201cas I formulate it today, is: To lead a long, healthy, fit and happy life \u2013 and to spend as much time as possible in euphoria and hyperfocus.\u201d<\/p>\n
He said \u201chyperfocus\u201d without shame. He said it like a person who does not see his own nervous system as a flaw, but as material.<\/p>\n
\u201cFrom that my decisions arise,\u201d he continued. \u201cI need physical exertion \u2013 strength training. I love good food and drink \u2013 preferably in a way that does me good. I like information \u2013 reading, documentaries, sometimes also television. I love structure \u2013 rituals, routines, daily paths, also through my dog.\u201d<\/p>\n
Hans thought: The dog as routine. How beautiful, how banal, how true.<\/p>\n
\u201cI love sun,\u201d said Dr. AuDHS, and you could sense how the word opened up in the room, because up here sun is a promise. \u201cAnd I love luxury vacations, because they really relieve me.\u201d<\/p>\n
A quiet, approving murmur went through the room, which immediately disappeared again, because approval in public spaces has something embarrassing about it.<\/p>\n
\u201cI love community,\u201d said Dr. AuDHS. \u201cFamily, marriage, children, people who are important to me.\u201d<\/p>\n
Morgenstern briefly looked down, as if he were holding something inside himself.<\/p>\n
\u201cAnd yes,\u201d Dr. AuDHS continued, \u201csuch a lifestyle costs money. But here too the crucial distinction is: I don\u2019t want to earn the maximum. I want to earn enough \u2013 and at the same time keep as much fulfilled lifetime as possible.\u201d<\/p>\n
Hans thought: The man who stands in a luxury vacation says he does not want to earn the maximum. That is either hypocrisy \u2013 or it is the truth that can only be spoken from luxury. And perhaps both are true at the same time.<\/p>\n
\u201cThat is the point,\u201d said Dr. AuDHS, \u201cat which career decisions suddenly make sense. Not: Which job brings the most? But: Which path gives me the best ratio of income, freedom, meaning and lifetime?\u201d<\/p>\n
Hans felt an old calculation open up inside him: desertion was a career decision. It had shifted income, freedom, meaning and lifetime for him in a way that one is not officially allowed to calculate.<\/p>\n
\u201cFor me,\u201d said Dr. AuDHS, \u201cthat was entrepreneurial activity, because it gives me more control over time \u2013 even if it has its price. For others it is a profession that becomes a calling. Both can be right. The only important thing is: It has to fit your sense of meaning.\u201d<\/p>\n
He said \u201cyour\u201d formally again; the crack between closeness and professionalism remained visible, and it was, strangely enough, likeable.<\/p>\n
\u201cAnd with that,\u201d said Dr. AuDHS, \u201cI come to what I call bestforming.\u201d<\/p>\n